Only Cats have 9 Lives? – Part I

Okay I know my blog is slightly ego-centric..I write mostly abt I , me and myself..but well cant help it ..its better than writing about Britney Spears latest ahem..flashing..:D..(which I noticed is a Hot and popular blog topicc.!)

Nehow, I keep telling my friends this story of how I’ve always felt I had more than 1 “life”..in the same sense as a CAT does(ahem touch/hug wood incase GOD is reading this;) ) Here are some of my personal experiencess :

Story Tagline : I am SuperGirl

Date : December 25, 1984

Heroine : 1.5 year old ME

Villain : 3.5 Yr Old Brother J

Venue : 1st floor Balcony of an apartment in Gujarat

It was a normal sunday afternoon.Mom was cooking, Dad was stitching buttons onto his shirt and I was crawling around in the balcony…In my version of the story, my villainous brother was standing downstairs convincing me to come down through the short-cut (can imagine him saying “Jump Charu..You dont have to crawl down the steps..This is so much easier..cmon..Jump ,you fat pig!“)..I always knew he was jealous that I was wayy cuter..Sigh..In my brother’s version of the story, my mom was apparently fed up with me and crept into the balcony to throw me down. And there my brother was, next to her, heart wrenchingly tugging at her sari saying ” Nahinnnnnnnnn…dont throw my chweet sissssssssstaaaaaaaaah down” ..Whatever it was, what happened was I Climbed over the balcony railings and then well but naturally, gravity took over :D..You know what happened next..chubby baby mee bouncing up and down the ground..All that fat in me came to SOME good use I suppose.;).Hehe..okay okay..My mom heard some “thud” sound..and came to the balcony and found baby me missing..So well I did spend that one night in the hospital..but nothing really happened..Although I choose to believe that the falling down has given me some secret Super power (being Christmas and all ;)) which hasnt shown its face yet but I shall give it time :D..

Story TagLine : I am T1000
Date : (Dont remember) Year : 1993

Heroine : Me obviously

Villain : Well Noone really ..my habits during slumber?!

Props : A Thermometer

Venue : A simple home in Riyadh

9 years have passsed since i tried jumping out of the balcony. It was just another normal school day. I came back from school and started craving for sympathy from mommie..and hence decided that I have fever. So I put the thermometer in my mouth and lay down. 3 frigging whole minutes later , the stoopid mercury hadnt budged even by a millimeter.Frustrated with it, I put it back into my mouth again.My mom passes by the room sees the thermometer in my mouth and goes to bhurk in the kitchen (I think it must have been a normal sight..me and thermometer..besht friends forever ;)) .. after 1.5 hours in the kitchen my mom passes by my room again and sees that the thermometer is STILL in my mouth.She then wakes me up and takes the thermometer..actually whatever was left of it, outside.Yup..I used to grind my teeth in my sleep and in the process had eaten more than half the thermometer ! * Applause * I am sooo proud of myself..My mom was really panicky since she was frantically searching all around me and there was no trace of either glass or mercury. I, on the other hand , was feeling excited…having gotten more than what I had bargained for. I found grounded glass pieces in my mouth which I promptly and proudly showed to my mom.That got her slightly more agitated, you know..Mercury is poisonous and eating glass cant really have good side effects can it?, and she rushed me to the hospital.The hospital staff were pretty amused that such a big girl (Although I was only 10 i looked older..sigh) had “Eaten” a thermometer :D..They tried alll methods to get the mercury to come out..Made me drink litres of saline water..which I drank to no effect and mom had to remind me WHY they were giving me saline water (..to u knw..puke :D)..And then when that didnt work, they inserted a tube through my nose and Pumped out stuff from my stomach..eww..ok that is gross..nehow, even that didnt work! They took 2-3 xrays of my stomach and I could see the mercury frollicking in my stomach..sometimes all joint, sometimes in 2-3 clusters, going to different parts of mah stomach..Was fun watching them :D.(Oh now u know why I was called T1000.. terminator 2? mercury man? ) The news about my case had spread around the hospital and there were many doctors wondering What they should do?? Then came the Anti-Climax..finally one of the doctors in the hospital called the US and told about this peculiar “case”..That amreekan doctor laughed and said “give her milk and send her home”!!! why? since apparently mercury in thermometers is not poisonous…But they let me stay overnight in any case, in a nice cozy room with a TV and those cool remote controlled beds…ALl those tube inserting things for nothing..Ughh..

So these two were my close encounters with ..da D word ..( ๐Ÿ˜‰ hahahaa..) Okay not really..but I would like to think so..All kinds of sympathy ( Chocolates/Flowers/Gifts) will be accepted ๐Ÿ˜€

PS: I made this Part 1 since I barely get time to update it..there are 2 more “ishtories” to tell..It will follow sometime in the future ๐Ÿ˜€

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8 responses to “Only Cats have 9 Lives? – Part I

  1. lol!!!
    ure bro sure must have not been jealous of u…u were nothing near cute…ahahahaha….u luked like a psycho kid to me..and the incidents above prove it too…hahahahhaa
    me meanoooooooooooooooo

  2. Majorly LOL!!.. donno if this is the effect of somebody visitin Bangalore or what but your blogs have suddenly got incredibly humorous :)).. hehe..

    And I seriously wonder how the doctors didn’t know that Hg in thermometers is not poisonous.. even a duffer like me knows about it ๐Ÿ˜€ :D..

  3. I have some information for you. The first two attempts were not accidents – and you forgot to mention your first brush with big D – Navjeevan Express – June 7th 1984 – 11:34 pm – S4 – call me for more details.

    Hee haaaa haaa … Heee Heee Haaa Haaaaaa … Heeeee Heeee Heee haaaa haaaaaaaaaa

  4. hahaha.. cudnt ishtop laughing.. u seriously have a phunnny bone.. very well written yaar.. waise u make me think ki who is better u or khushwant singh.. i wud say.. u r better anyday.. ๐Ÿ˜€

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